Sunday, January 6, 2019

We've Done It! It's Here, Time Travel!


After Centuries Of Scientists & Physicists 

Being Tortured With The Possibility 

Of Alternate Realities, Parallel Universes, 

Wormholes, Space Time And 

Time Travel
  
We Have Finally Arrived To 
The Next Plateau Of Our Sciences.

A Prototype Of The First Actual Time Machine 
Has Been Built And Tested!
 Let Me Introduce You To The

Rondoids Fully Digital 
Multi-Gamma Processor 
With 500 Zettabyte Optical Memory 
Time Machine. 
 Made In the USA!

And Now What You've Been Waiting For,
 The Test!
 While The Accuracy Of The Target Time Frame
Is Still In Research We Settled For A 50 
Year Resolution To Start With.
The Test Subject Was Fitted With A 
Nasa Designed Pressure Suit 
And Also Equipped With 
Oxygen, Water & Ozone Generators.
The Results! 
 Our Test Subject Fell Upon 
The Year 2059 And This Is What 
He Observed And Recorded.


Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest Country in the world, Mexifornia,  formerly known as California. 
Nancy Pelosi, Ruth Ginsberg & 
Diane Feinstein Finally Retire. 
Hillary Clinton gets ready for another run.   
 

White minorities are still trying to have English
recognized as the third language.  
  
Spotted Owl plague threatens Northwestern
      
United States crops and livestock. 
   
Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.
   


Couple petitions court to reinstate 
heterosexual  marriage.    


Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
    


France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica. No other country comes forward to help.

 

Last Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.    


George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2060.
'
   
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
   


Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

 

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.    


Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba.
   


Japanese scientists have created a camera with such
a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.    


Abortion clinics now available in every 
High School in United States.

 
Senate still blocking  drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.    


Massachusetts
executes last remaining conservative.   
 
Supreme Court rules any punishment of criminals
violates their civil rights.    


A Couple Finally Had Sexual Harmony
,
They had simultaneous Headaches.    


Average height of NBA players is now nine feet seven inches with only 5 illegitimate children
   


New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2060.
   


IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
  
 
Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines.

 Our Test Subject Returned Back 
In Good Health And Immediately Ran To The Local Board Of Elections Office To Change His 
Political Affiliation To Republican!
 

No comments:

Post a Comment