Wednesday, June 20, 2018

A CAT NAMED PIPPIN. _Jack Blanchard's Column June 20, 2018























  Thousands of intelligent good-looking readers.


A CAT NAMED PIPPIN

Misty and I have had 6 dogs and 1 cat in our life together.
We loved them all. 

Pippin was an Orange Tabby.
He was abandoned by his original owner
and became the hobo cat of the neighborhood.
He learned how to beg,
and which homes offered handouts.

He was outdoors in all weather,
and he and I became friends when we met on the streets.
Then, when Misty and I would go for walks,
Pippin would trot along with us.
We took him into our home and he became part of our family.
We loved him.

Pippin could be a block away
and when I called his name he'd run all the way home.
One morning he died on our doorstep,
poisoned by an antifreeze leak from a car.
Life is too damn fragile!
*      *      *

KIRBY STONE.
In the 1980s, when our big country bookings got scarce,
Misty and I filled the gap by playing jazz clubs and hotels
around New York State.

At that time there was a popular vocal/comedy group
called The Kirby Stone Four.
They were all over network TV
and got a Grammy for "Baubles, Bangles and Beads".

Kirby heard about us
and was going to book us in a famous NYC hotel lounge
for lots of money.
We didn't hear from him for a week so I called his number.
I was told by his wife that he had just died.
We felt sorry for her, and a little bit for us.
*      *      *     

TONAWANDA, NY.
One early morning when I was nineteen
a deputy sheriff knocked on my door.
He wanted me to go with him to "just have a talk with the sheriff".
My hangover saved the day.
I must have looked bad because he asked me if I was sick.
A very creative lie just popped right out of me: "I've got the measles."
He took a step back.
Then he said, "Well, come down to the Office when you can."
I hitch-hiked to Florida.
*      *      *

When I was a young brat
a lot of the kids in our neighborhood were getting their adenoids taken out.
It was a war to eliminate adenoids from the Earth.
I don't think anybody knew what they were,
but they wanted them gone.
*      *      *    

Before I got into music full time
I worked in a lot of factories, tried selling encyclopedias,
dug graves, greased cement mixers, drove a school bus,
and did a bunch of other jobs.
I had a perfect employment record:
I never worked anyplace I could go back to.
*      *      *

MY INVENTION:
A hands-free umbrella for bald guys,
with a plunger on the bottom to hold it on the head.

Jack Blanchard


Jack Blanchard & Misty Morgan...
Home Page: http://www.jackandmisty.net
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jackandmisty
Billboard Duet of the Year, Grammy and CMA Finalists. 

© Jack Blanchard, 2018.





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