Tuesday, June 27, 2017

Jack Blanchard's Column - June 26, 2017 - SIX TRUE STORIES AND ONE LIE








THE BALLET EXPERIMENT

Business was off at the ballet.
The theater manager was sharp enough to realize that not
everybody likes the ballet. Some people like trombone playing.
He did an extensive talent search and found a ballerina who
could play the trombone.
He offered her big bucks if she could learn to do both at once.

The house was packed on opening night. The ballerina danced
"Swan Lake" brilliantly, playing the trombone all the way, until the
last act which called for a pirouette and a seventh position
trombone lick at the same time. She tripped over another swan,
blew her teeth to the audience,
and did an ad lib five minute pain dance.

I know this story is true because I was that ballerina.
Jack Blanchard
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When Misty Morgan was Maryanne Donahue, and six years old,
she sang "Cabin in the Sky" on a radio talent program.
That's a tough song to sing even for an adult.
The winner was a kid that tap danced. On the radio!
The announcer, Colin Male, later became her brother-in-law,
and he was the announcer on The Andy Griffith Show.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

PIRATE RECORDS.
We've found pirate versions of our
recordings in gas stations, truck stops, and convenience stores
all over the country. One was an 8-track cartridge with a
collection of some of our singles that had never been on albums.
They just took our 45s and put them on tape. On the front cover
they had bad drawings of Misty and me.
They had her hair drawn high enough to stop a ceiling fan.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

FROM STEVE HALL/SHOTGUN RED:
"I did a show years ago in Minnesota with Jack & Misty
and I was just a kid so I got a real lesson on how to entertain a crowd.
Not only were their songs cool
but they had the crowd eating out of their hands with comedy...
I know it has been 30 years but I still remember Jack
telling the crowd that he doesn't touch anything in the bathroom...
he flushes the toilet with his foot... he turns the water on and off
with his elbows ... he said he doesn't even touch the door knob
on the way out... he opens it with his teeth! I talked a lot with Jack
because he wouldn't let me near Misty! I don't blame him!"
Steve Hall / Shotgun Red: Nashville, Tennessee.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

STARTING OUT.
Misty and I and a drummer once played on a three hour cruise.
We spent the whole evening chasing the drums and piano
around the dance floor.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

ON THE ROAD.
We were doing a Southern tour with Leroy van Dyke, and one
place they didn't have enough electricity to run to the flatbed for
our show. Leroy offered to let us plug in to his bus generator.
Worked fine. People share on the road.
Merle Haggard used our PA system when his wasn't working.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

ONE NIGHT.
Misty and I were on the road in our motor home. It was about 2
AM and we pulled into a Walmart lot and turned out the lights.
A watchman pounded on our door and yelled,
"YOU CAN'T SLEEP HERE!".
We both shouted, "WE'RE NOT SLEEPING!"


Jack Blanchard




-- Jack Blanchard & Misty Morgan... Home Page: http://www.jackandmisty.net Awards: Grammy, Billboard, CMA, BMI, ASCAP. Mastering & restoration studio: 352-530-2068. Email: jackandmisty@gmail.com.
© Jack Blanchard, 2017.



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